I want to feel love dammit, I want to ache when I think about that I have to wait to see you, I want to go crazy from missing you, I want to feel whole again when I see you, to feel in bliss when we slowly embrace under the dimmed lights, to lie in together, to feed each other and play with our food, to feel jealous when you talk about other people, to reconcile in tears, to explore together in unknown places, to feel like we are the only two people in the world, I want to feel bliss…I want to feel connected…I want to feel love!
I often perceive myself making the same mistakes over and over again, I think I know the right door ways and paths to follow to lead to a better more productive and possibly happier self but I find myself screaming at my continued inability to change, like I am not directly connected to the decision making part of my existence, I just coax along watching the days and years pass by into nothingness my existence slowly fading away, like was I ever even here, are my memories real, am I who I was, was who I was better than the me right now, will the future me one day find the courage to make a change, am I missing something to make me whole or can I become whole on and by myself?
She sat there before the boy in the light of the gentle sun, flicks of hair lightly blowing in the warm summer breeze, while the rest fell around her shoulders like a waterfall of pure perfect sunlight, curls and highlights appearing as if they were placed their by some divine hand to perfect this one moment of bliss. She gently stared into the distance slowly blinking every so often, the sun illuminating every perfect curve of her beautiful portrait, her lips the perfect shade of rose lightly and naturally pursed, each line flowed as if drawn from the boys own dreams blurring the lines of reality. The boy ached from such a scene knowing that this moment was going to end and that he might never experience such a scene of such pure beauty again in his lifetime.